Is he for real? When I read this, I knew it couldn't be good. And I was right. Real Housewife New York star, Simon Van Kempen dropped his new synth-pop dance track, I Am Real and to say that it's awful is like saying Charlie Sheen favors coke and busloads of hookers -- mild understatement. 

What is it with reality stars and their delusions of vocal talent? Simon joins Countess Luann, Kim Zolciak and prostitution whore, Danielle Staub in the all-star world of fame-whoring set to pseudo dance beats. The sad part is I know there will be folks out there lined up to buy this crap, just like they were lined up to pay $50 a pop to watch Teresa Guidice wax poetic about "having it all," which is actually code for living beyond your means and bankruptcy. Ugh. 

On one hand, if I was in the mood, I could totally have fun because it's ironically hilarious, especially since the beginning has a cheesy Falco "Der Kommissar" sound to it. Seriously though, if you even have to say stuff like, "I am real," or "I'm classy," you know the jig's up. But first, I need to stop my ears from throwing up.

What do you think?

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